The Love Guru


The Love Guru is a 2008 romantic comedy film directed by Marco Schnabel in his directorial debut. It was written and produced by Mike Myers, who was the leading cast-member along with Jessica Alba, Justin Timberlake, Romany Malco, Meagan Good, Verne Troyer, John Oliver, Omid Djalili, and Ben Kingsley. The film follows Pitka, a guru who is tasked with revitalizing the Toronto Maple Leafs hockey team.
Myers came up with the concept of a Guru character in the late 1990s. The aforementioned character was initially planned to appear in the Austin Powers franchise, but was left unimplemented. The film came from Myers' desire to make a hockey movie, expressing wish fulfillment in the film's plot. Filming commenced in Toronto, Canada in August 2007. Before release, the film's portrayal of Hinduism received divided responses from Hindu audiences, who remained cautious at the film's handling of cultural themes. Paramount Pictures, the film's main distributor, eventually enabled pre-screenings for select representatives of the Hindu American Foundation, who concluded that the film was not problematic.
The Love Guru was released in the United States on June 20, 2008, by Paramount, with the United Kingdom and Germany getting releases later that year in August and October respectively, albeit with a different distribution partner for the latter. It was panned by critics and audiences who criticized its humor, screenplay, and Schnabel's direction, often being considered a low-point in Myers' career and one of the worst films ever made. It was a box-office failure, grossing $40 million on a budget of $62 million. At the 29th Golden Raspberry Awards, the film won three of its seven nominations, including Worst Picture.

Plot

Guru Pitka is the self proclaimed "number-two guru in the world", after Deepak Chopra. A flashback shows Pitka was an orphan, taught by Guru Tugginmypudha. When the twelve-year-old Pitka announces he wants to become a guru so that girls will love him, Tugginmypudha puts a chastity belt on him until he can learn that loving himself is more important than being loved by others.
Pitka's dream is to become the number-one guru and appear on The Oprah Winfrey Show. He lives a charmed life with thousands of followers, including celebrities Jessica Simpson, Val Kilmer and Mariska Hargitay. Pitka's teachings, which involve simplistic acronyms and plays on words, are displayed in PowerPoint slide shows.
In Canada, Jane Bullard inherits the Toronto Maple Leafs hockey team, who are on a losing streak. Their star player, Darren Roanoke, has been playing badly ever since his wife Prudence left him for Los Angeles Kings goaltender Jacques "Lè Coq" Grandé. Jane is a big fan of Pitka's and offers him $2 million to fix Darren's marriage so the team can win the Stanley Cup. Pitka's agent tells him if he succeeds, Oprah will have him on her show. Pitka also meets team coach Cherkov, and mocks his dwarfism.
Pitka and Jane bond on the plane ride. Jane became a fan of Pitka's work due to the death of her father and admits she has a crush on Pitka. When Jane says she had a gay experience in college, Pitka gets an erection, causing his chastity belt to clank.
During a game, Pitka encourages the rival team to beat up Darren to distract him. Darren begins to play well, but then gets suspended for the next two games after beating up Lè Coq and hitting Coach Cherkov with a hockey puck.
Pitka has dinner with Jane and almost kisses her but his chastity belt clanks again. She leaves feeling rejected. In revenge for Pitka's antics, Coach Cherkov punches Pitka in the testicles. Pitka throws a tantrum over the pain to his testicles as they are overly sensitive due to 33 years of blue balls.
Dick Pants warns Pitka to hurry up the process or he will lose his spot on Oprah to Deepak Chopra again. Pitka is adamant that Darren is not ready, but puts Darren and his wife together regardless. This reconciliation fails. Pitka then drives himself and Darren to Niagara Falls and helps Darren realize that since his mother only showed him love when he succeeded he had grown to believe Prudence would only love him if he won.
With time running out, Pitka distracts Lè Coq with his idol, Celine Dion, and lies to Prudence that Darren stood up to his mom, encouraging her to return to her husband. During the final game, Lè Coq, having heard that Darren cannot play with his mother watching, gets her to sing the national anthem, causing Darren to flee. At the airport on his way to guest on Oprah, Pitka sees the news on television and goes back to help Darren. Pitka reveals his chastity belt to Jane, explaining why he pulled away from her. Jane says she understands.
After standing up to his mother, Darren recovers until Lè Coq brags that Prudence prefers him in bed. Darren freezes, and Pitka realizes he needs another distraction, which he provides by getting two elephants to have sex in the middle of the rink. Darren wakes from his stupor and scores the winning goal. After the game, Coach Cherkov apologizes for the groin attack, Pitka offers a hug but as Cherkov obliges he punches him in the face and threatens to beat him up if he ever attacks him again. They then make up and become friends. He then meets Deepak Chopra and decides that he is fine with being the first Guru Pitka instead of the next Deepak Chopra.
Back in India, Tugginmypudha tells Pitka that he has finally learned to love himself and removes Pitka's chastity belt, revealing there was just a hook in the back. The film ends with Jane and Pitka dancing together in a Bollywood-style number to a rendition of "The Joker".

Cast

  • Mike Myers as Guru Maurice Pitka / Himself – Pitka is the 2nd top guru behind Deepak Chopra. After his parents, two dog groomers turned missionaries, died at 12, he was sent to live in a small village in India. He initially aspired to be a guru to be a lothario. His guru has him forced into a vow of celibacy until he learns self-love and many other humiliating tasks. Thirty-three years later, in the present, with a chance to finally be on The Oprah Winfrey Show, he is hired to travel to America to fix the relationship between Darren and Prudence.
  • Jessica Alba as Jane Bullard, the owner of the Toronto Maple Leafs, an heir to her father who died. She is disliked by fans of the team, but she is a big fan of Pitka's work helping her through her grief with her father. She is also attracted to him. He falls in love with her at first sight.
  • Justin Timberlake as Jacques "Le Coq" Grandé, the rival goalie. He is dating Darren's wife. He is famous for being well endowed.
  • Romany Malco as Darren Roanoke. With his love life in shambles, Pitka aids him in fixing his relationship.
  • Meagan Good as Prudence Roanoke, Darren's wife and Jacques's lover.
  • Verne Troyer as Coach Punch Cherkov, the coach of the Maple Leafs. He is irritable and dislikes Pitka due to his cruel jokes about his dwarfism.
  • Ben Kingsley as Guru Tugginmypudha, the quirky guru of Pitka. He is severely cross eyed due to excessive masturbation.
  • Omid Djalili as Guru Satchabigknoba / Gagandeep Singh, a rival guru to Pitka. His scenes were cut from the film.
  • Telma Hopkins as Lillian Roanoke, Darren's overbearing mother.
  • John Oliver as Richard "Dick" Pants, Pitka's greedy agent.
  • Manu Narayan as Rajneesh, Pitka's assistant and closest friend.
  • Stephen Colbert as Jay Kell, an NHL hockey announcer and drug addict.
  • Jim Gaffigan as Trent Lueders, an NHL hockey announcer.
  • Rob Huebel as Bar Patron
  • Daniel Tosh as Cowboy Hat
  • Samantha Bee as Cinnabon Cashier
As Themselves
  • Jessica Simpson
  • Kanye West
  • Deepak Chopra
  • Rob Blake
  • Mariska Hargitay
  • Val Kilmer
  • Oprah Winfrey

    Music

The original score for the film was composed by George S. Clinton, who also composed the score for the Austin Powers films, also starring, written and produced by Mike Myers. Clinton recorded it with an eighty-piece ensemble of the Hollywood Studio Symphony at Warner Bros.
The song "Dhadak Dhadak" from the Bollywood film of 2005, Bunty Aur Babli, was used in the trailer.
The songs "9 to 5", "More Than Words", and "The Joker" are all in the film and on the soundtrack. "Brimful of Asha" was also used in the film.

Production

Mike Myers first came up with the idea for Guru Pitka in the mid-1990s. The character was originally planned for the Austin Powers franchise. Myers began workshopping the character in New York comedy clubs in 2005. He billed these live shows as "An Evening With His Holiness the Guru Pitka". Myers said, "about a third of the audience were friends of mine who would come. A third of the audience would be people that had heard that I was doing it. And a third would be people thinking they were coming to see an actual guru. I did that for a year and I videotaped them and it informed me." Myers wore a prosthetic nose for the character both in the live performances and in the film.
The Love Guru was in part inspired by Myers' career-long desire to make a hockey movie. A fan of the Toronto Maple Leafs, Myers described the film's plot as wish fulfillment, saying, "I figure the only way that my team will win a Cup is if I write it."
First time director Marco Schnabel had previously worked with Myers as a second unit director on the Austin Powers series, most notably Austin Powers in Goldmember. The Love Guru filmed in Toronto in August 2007. It was intended to start a franchise.
John Oliver made his feature film debut in The Love Guru and was cast due to Myers enjoying The Daily Show. Samantha Bee filmed a cameo but only makes a silent appearance in the final cut of the film. Dialogue for her character is included in a bonus feature of deleted scenes contained on the film's home media release.