Kiss the Girls and Make Them Die
Kiss the Girls and Make Them Die is a James Bond spoof film released in 1966 as an Italian-American co-production between Dino De Laurentiis' Cinematografica and Columbia Pictures. Directed by Henry Levin, with stars Mike Connors, Dorothy Provine, and as the villain, Raf Vallone, it was originally filmed from January to March 1966 under the title Operation Paradise and distributed in some parts of the English-speaking world as If All the Women in the World.
Plot
Financed by Red China, a Brazilian industrialist plans to sterilize the United States through massive doses of radiation courtesy of his satellite. He double crosses the Chinese by scheming to sterilize the entire Earth, then personally repopulate the planet with beautiful women he has kidnapped and is holding in suspended animation. A down-to-earth CIA agent, an aristocratic female MI-6 agent, and her chauffeur, driving a Rolls-Royce car filled with spy gadgets, team up to stop the madman.Cast
Music credits
- Music and special musical effects by Mario Nascimbene
- Conducted by Roberto Pregadio
- Harmonica soloist John Sebastian
- The song "Kiss the Girls and Make Them Die"
Background
This film was rushed into release by Columbia Pictures to avoid colliding with their better-known James Bond satire, Casino Royale. The plot of Kiss the Girls and Make Them Die is similar to the James Bond film Moonraker, which was released 13 years later.
Production
Michael Connors recalled that Columbia Pictures gave him the lead after he had been a strong contender for the role of Matt Helm that Dean Martin played. Connors said that Dorothy Provine was whisked to Rome for a week, returning in a glamorous makeover. While Connors portrayed a Sean Connery-type American superspy, Dorothy Provine played her role with an upper-class British accent similar to Lady Penelope Creighton-Ward of the Thunderbirds TV series. Her character rode a gadget-filled Rolls-Royce driven by an Aloysius Parker-type chauffeur played by Terry-Thomas. The movie was filmed on location in Rio de Janeiro and Rome with Dino De Laurentiis spending a lot of money on production.Connors also recalled that he did the stuntwork of dangling from a rope ladder attached to a helicopter flying off the Christ the Redeemer statue in Rio when the local stuntman refused to do it. Connors said that they were the only film company ever granted permission to film at the landmark.
Reception
Variety was critical of the film stating that "Dino De Laurentiis has made a limp, banal spy spoof, inept in all departments. Pace is plodding, dialog pallid, direction pedestrian, acting an embarrassment, and technical composition awkward." and that it was an "Unsatisfactory spy spoof for dual bills".Leonard Maltin's Movie Guide gives Kiss the Girls and Make Them Die its lowest rating, BOMB, describing it as a "ull spy spoof" and commenting that "a satellite capable of sterilizing the world" is "something Bond, Flint, and Matt Helm wouldn't mind. Awful film." Steven H. Scheuer's [Movies on TV and Videocassette] had a barely higher opinion, allowing 1½ stars and dispatching it with the final line, "ongue-in-cheek secret-agent stuff doesn't come off: a yawn."
The Motion Picture Guide assigned the film its lowest ranking of 1 star, proclaiming that "here is little to recommend in this secret-agent spoof" and pointing out that "verything from the sloppy special effects to the irritating music radiates an uncanny cheapness. Dubbed in English."
Two specialized guidebooks arrive at a split vote. Michael Weldon's Psychotronic Encyclopedia of Film agrees with the denigrators, giving it a plot outline that ends with the words, "he worst Bond imitation known to man. With Terry-Thomas, Margaret Lee, Beverly Adams, Marilu Tolo, Nazi scientists, and Communist Chinese. Filmed in Rio De Janeiro. Connors did Mannix next." On the other hand, John Stanley's Creature Features The Science Fiction, Fantasy, and Horror Movie Guide decided that "lthough a pale copy of 007's exploits, it has a sparkle to its comedy, gorgeous women in figure-flattering wardrobes, and scenic action set against picturesque Rio." After describing the plot, Stanley concludes with, "Michael Connors walks somnambulistic through his role as super agent Kelly who has minipistols hidden in his clothing and is always eating bananas. A standout is Terry-Thomas as a chauffeur secret agent. Directed by Henry Levin and Dino Maiuri. Dorothy Provine portrays Connors' charming, sexy contact."
The sole British cinema compiler to acknowledge the film, Leslie Halliwell in his 1985 Film and Video Guide 5th edition, gave no stars, dismissing it as a "atchy James Bond spoof."