Fun with Veal
"Fun with Veal" is the fourth episode of the sixth season of the animated television series South Park, and the 83rd episode of the series overall. It is the 4th episode in production order. It originally aired in the United States on Comedy Central on March 27, 2002. In the episode, Stan and the boys are horrified when they find what veal is made from, and then kidnap all the baby cows from a local ranch in South Park.
Plot
's fourth grade class goes on a field trip to a farm, where they discover that veal is made of baby cows. The boys, apart from Cartman, are horrified and decide to save the calves from becoming veal. Stan, Kyle, and Butters attempt to convince Cartman to help them rescue the calves and bring them to Stan's house. Cartman is forced to join the others to rescue the calves with his Mission Impossible Breaking and Entering play-set. When they are discovered by their parents the next morning, the boys barricade the door until they are promised the calves will be safe. Sharon Marsh|Sharon] refuses to lie and say they will be safe out of fear of regretting it, and Randy can not remove the door without destroying the house.The situation quickly escalates into a standoff between the boys, who are declared terrorists, and the police. They live off some food smuggled in by Liane Cartman, which contains meat. While most of the group eagerly eats this food, Stan does not, as his reason for doing the deed extends far beyond just protecting the calves, so he becomes a vegetarian. Cartman makes fun of this, saying "if you don't eat meat, you become a pussy." Later, Stan comes down with a strange illness, and develops sores on his face.
An FBI negotiator proves no match for Cartman's powers of manipulation, and he negotiates for guns and ammunition in return for a calf. When the boys get the guns Cartman further manipulates the negotiator for an ICBM, but unsuccessfully tries to get North and South Dakota. He gets the FDA to change the term for veal to "little tortured baby cow", and negotiates for a cattle truck driven by Michael Dorn. Furthermore, Dorn is forced into full Worf makeup and must call Cartman 'Captain'. He is to drive everyone to the airport so they can escape to Mexico, despite being reluctant to do so. All of this, without handing over a single calf. The negotiator, due to easily giving in to these ludicrous demands, is eventually fired.
The FBI double-crosses the boys and the calves are returned, but are rendered useless, as there is now no market for "little tortured baby cow". Stan has to go to the hospital; it turns out Cartman was correct about the results of not eating meat when Stan's doctor explains that he has vaginitis, and the sores on his face were actually vaginas, which would have turned him into a giant vagina. The episode ends with the boys, with the possible exception of Cartman, getting grounded, but not before going out with their parents for burgers.