Self-pity

Self-pity is an emotion in which one feels self-centered sorrow and pity toward the self regarding one's own internal and external experiences of suffering. Self-pity has also been defined as an emotion "directed towards others with the goal of attracting attention, empathy, or help"

Description/ Definition

The feeling of self-pity typically arises when an individual attributes failures to external factors perceived as uncontrollable. Although the primary focus of self-pity is on the self and one's own emotions, it has a strong interpersonal component as well. In addition to loneliness, subjects may also feel "envy, blame, anger, and hostility directed towards others".
However, it is also very common for people suffering from self-pity to deflect criticism of themselves; they are usually incapable of self-reflection and blame their bad situation only on external factors, such as bad luck or other people's supposed resentment.
Self-pity is different from self-compassion, which consists of extending compassion to oneself in cases of failure or general suffering.

Effects

The research based on observation on self-pity is very slim, but the research that is available shows that self-pity can be an effect from a stressor of a dramatic event. It can also be shown that aspects of one's personality can affect one's self-pity. Although others initially respond to self-pity with empathic concern, the interpersonal effects of frequent expression of self-pity can be detrimental. Individuals who engage in pervasive self-pity may be more likely to be rejected by their peers and may commonly be perceived as querulous.

Treatment

As self-pity is observed to be associated with rumination and avoidance coping strategies, it is an important emotional experience to acknowledge in therapeutic settings.