Arranged marriage


An arranged marriage is a marriage where the spouses are selected by a third party. It differs from a love marriage, in which the spouses know each other and themselves initiate the marriage. An arranged marriage, by contrast, is organized by the third party with the couple having little to no say. The third party is most commonly the spouses' parents, possibly with the aid of a marriage broker.
Normally, the couple must agree to the arranged marriage. However, in a forced marriage, one or both of the partners does not consent; and in a child marriage, one or both partners cannot consent because they are under 18 years old. Marriages without consent are condemned by the United Nations.
Arranging marriages has historically been common in many cultures and religious traditions. It remains widespread in certain regions, particularly South Asia, West Asia and North Africa, Central Asia, Southeast Asia, and sub-Saharan Africa. In other parts of the world, such as Europe and East Asia, the practice has declined substantially since the 19th century.

History

Arranged marriages were the norm throughout the world until the 18th century. Typically, marriages were arranged by parents, grandparents or other close relatives and trusted friends. Some historical exceptions are known, such as courtship and betrothal rites during the Renaissance period of Italy and Gandharva Vivah in the Vedic period in the Indian subcontinent..
Arranged marriages have declined in countries where forced marriages were politically outlawed or in prosperous countries with more social mobility and increasing individualism; nevertheless, arranged marriages might still be seen in countries of Europe and North America, among royal families, aristocrats and minority religious groups, such as in placement marriage among fundamentalist Mormon groups of the United States. In most other parts of the world, arranged marriages continue to varying degrees and increasingly in quasi-arranged form, along with autonomous marriages.

Europe

In France arranged marriages were normal until the Second World War.
Courtship and betrothal rites were known during the Renaissance period of Italy
Arranged marriages were the norm in Russia before the early 20th century, most of which were endogamous.

America

Until the first half of the 20th century, arranged marriages were common in migrant families in the United States. They were sometimes called "picture-bride marriages" among Japanese-American immigrants because the bride and groom knew each other only through the exchange of photographs before the day of their marriage. These marriages among immigrants were typically arranged by parents or close relatives from the country of their origin. As immigrants settled in and melded into a new culture, arranged marriages shifted first to quasi-arranged marriages where parents or friends made introductions and the couple met before the marriage; over time, the marriages among the descendants of these immigrants shifted to autonomous marriages driven by individual's choice, dating and courtship preferences, and an increase in marrying outside of their own ethnic group. Similar historical dynamics are claimed in other parts of the world.

Asia

In China, arranged marriages —sometimes called blind marriages —were the norm before the mid-20th century. A marriage was a negotiation and decision between parents and other older members of two families. The bride and groom were typically told to get married, without a right to demur, even if they had never met each other until the wedding day.

Comparison

Marriages have been categorized into four groups in scholarly studies:
  • Forced arranged marriage: parents or guardians select, the individuals are neither consulted nor have any say before the marriage
  • Consensual arranged marriage: parents or guardians select, then the individuals are consulted, who consider and consent, and each individual has the power to refuse; sometimes, the individuals meet—in a family setting or privately—before engagement and marriage as in shidduch custom among Orthodox Jews
  • Self-selected marriage: individuals select, then parents or guardians are consulted, who consider and consent, and where parents or guardians have the power of veto.
  • Autonomous marriage: individuals select, the parents or guardians are neither consulted nor have any say before the marriage
Gary Lee and Lorene Stone suggest that most adult marriages in recent modern history are somewhere on the scale between consensual arranged and autonomous marriage, in part because marriage is a social institution. Similarly, Broude and Greene, after studying 142 cultures worldwide, have reported that 130 cultures have elements of arranged marriage.
Extreme examples of forced arranged marriage have been observed in some societies, particularly in child marriages of girls below age 12. Illustrations include vani which is currently seen in some tribal/rural parts of Pakistan, and Shim-pua marriage in Taiwan before the 1970s.

Types

There are many kinds of arranged marriages. Some of these are:
  • Arranged exogamous marriage: is one where a third party finds and selects the bride and groom irrespective of their social, economic and cultural group.
  • Arranged endogamous marriage: is one where a third party finds and selects the bride and groom from a particular social, economic and cultural group.
  • Consanguineous marriage: is a type of arranged endogamous marriage. It is one where the bride and groom share a grandparent or near ancestor. Examples of these include first cousin marriages, uncle-niece marriages, second cousin marriages, and so on. The most common consanguineous marriages are first cousin marriages, followed by second cousin and uncle-niece marriages. Between 25 and 40% of all marriages in parts of Saudi Arabia and Pakistan are first cousin marriages; while overall consanguineous arranged marriages exceed 65% to 80% in various regions of North Africa and Central Asia.
The bride and groom in all of the above types of arranged marriages usually do have the right to consent; if the bride or the groom or both do not have a right to consent, it is called a forced marriage. Forced marriages are not the same as regular arranged marriages; these forced arrangements do not have the full and free consent of both parties. Arranged marriages are commonly associated with religious tradition.
According to The Hindu Marriage Act, 1955 of the Republic of India, non-consensual marriages and marriages where either the bridegroom is below the age of 21 years or the bride is below the age of 18 are prohibited for Hindus, Buddhists, Sikhs and Jains.
Non-consanguineous arranged marriage is one where the bride and groom do not share a grandparent or near ancestor; this type of arranged marriage is common in Hindu and Buddhist South Asia, Southeast Asia, East Asia and Christian Latin America and sub-Saharan Africa. Consanguineous marriages are against the law in many parts of United States and Europe. In the United Kingdom, uncle-niece marriages are considered incestuous and are illegal, but cousin marriages are not forbidden, although there have been calls to ban first-cousin marriages due to health concerns. While consanguineous arranged marriages are common and culturally preferred in many Islamic countries and among migrants from Muslim countries to other parts of the world, they are culturally forbidden or considered undesirable in most Christian, Hindu and Buddhist societies. Consanguineous arranged marriages were also common in a number of Jewish communities before the 20th century, but have declined to less than 10% in modern times.

Forced vs. arranged marriages

Forced and arranged marriages are distinct practices found in various cultures, each defined by different principles and legal implications.
A forced marriage involves coercion, where one or both parties are compelled to marry against their will. This is often achieved through emotional manipulation, threats, or physical violence. Because this practice disregards individual autonomy and genuine consent, it is considered a violation of human rights and frequently leads to profound emotional distress.
In contrast, an arranged marriage involves familial or community intervention to suggest a spouse based on cultural, religious, or social factors. Crucially, in an arranged marriage, the consent of both individuals remains the primary requirement. While the process operates within a framework of societal expectations, the prospective spouses retain their agency and have the final say in the union.
The fundamental difference between these two practices is the presence or absence of free and full consent. Jennifer Burns, Director of Anti-Slavery Australia, clarifies this distinction:
"Arranged marriages are widely practised in Australia... but ultimately, the couple decides whether they want to marry. A forced marriage is the opposite. There is no complete and free consent."

Enforcement

In some communities, especially in rural parts of the Middle East, North Africa, and South Asia, a woman who refuses to go through with an arranged marriage, tries to leave an arranged marriage via divorce, or is suspected of any kind of "immoral" behaviour may be considered to have dishonored her entire family. Male relatives may be ridiculed or harassed, and any of the woman's siblings may find it impossible to enter into a marriage. In these cases, killing the woman is a way for the family to enforce the institution of arranged marriages. Unlike cases of domestic violence, honor killings are often done publicly and there are frequently family members involved in the act.

Arranged matchmaking in India

For matchmakers, traditionally called nayan, in India it is customary for them to be a family friend or a distant relative. Some people however do not prefer to use a matchmaker. As stated by Santana Flanigan, "Some families with marriageable age children may prefer not to approach possible matches with a marriage proposal because communication between families could break down, and could result in accidental disrespect between the two families." This person is a neutral matchmaker when families are trying to plan an arranged marriage. The nayan usually has two roles that they play: one is as a marriage scout and the other is as a negotiator. As a marriage scout, the matchmaker goes out into the community and tries to find a potential match for the person who wants to get married. As a negotiator, the matchmaker talks to different families and tries to come to a common ground about a potential arranged marriage between two families. While going about this process the matchmaker takes into account several different considerations including but not limited to family background, financial status, and family reputation. Once the nayan finds a match they will get in contact with the families and start to arrange communication between the future couple. Communication starts strictly from the matchmaker to the two people and their families. Eventually, families will begin to communicate with each other while also allowing the new couple to communicate with one another. After the families have talked about the marriage and made wedding plans the matchmakers come back to help in the process of the wedding. The help offered by the nayan can come in the form of jewelry or wedding setup. Usually, the matchmaker does not receive any pay for the work that they have done but will often be given gifts from the families of the new couple.