One-line joke


A one-liner is a joke that is delivered in a single line. A good one-liner is said to be pithy – concise and meaningful. Comedians and actors use this comedic method as part of their performance, and many fictional characters are also known to deliver one-liners, including James Bond, who often makes pithy and laconic quips after disposing of a villain.

Examples

  • "Never read a pop-up book about giraffes."
  • "Throwing acid is wrong. In some people's eyes."
  • "My girlfriend makes me want to be a better person - so I can get a better girlfriend."
  • "Cricket. No matter who wins, both teams, and all the fans, are losers."
  • "An escalator cannot break, it can only become stairs."
  • "My movies were the kind they show in prisons and airplanes, because nobody can leave."
  • "I'm on a whiskey diet… I've lost three days already."
  • "It's good to see me, isn't it?"
  • "I have nothing to declare except my genius."
  • "They hired a 3-piece band that was so lousy, every time the waiter dropped a tray, we all got up and danced!"
  • "What a magnificent show this is going to be when it starts!"
  • "I have a girlfriend! I've been going out with my girlfriend for… sex!"
  • "I have an L-shaped sofa… Lowercase."
  • "Crime in multi-story car parks is wrong on so many different levels."
  • "My wife – it's difficult to say what she does. She sells seashells on the seashore."
  • "In Scotland the forbidden fruit is fruit."
  • "Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last long if you’re fat."
  • "I was so ugly; my mother had morning sickness after I was born"